35for35: braindump

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I’m a perfectionist, a strategist, a mother, a creative genius, a wife, a writer. All of which I had to learn. And still,I am nothing short of a student of the game. As an enthusiastic student, I continue to challenge myself to embrace curiosity and delight in what an honor it is to keep learning. The truth is, we should all aspire to seek out greater knowledge. However today, is my day, so this is about me. About how I needed to “tune-up” my life and recalibrate my mind.

35 for 35.

35. I will never understand everything; everything is not for me to understand.

34. There’s a difference between secrecy & privacy; know the difference. Everything isn’t for everyone. And you can change the mode at your will.

33. I unapologetically reclaimed my privacy. The devil doesn’t know what to attack & I have nothing to prove.

32. Staying creative & inspired takes effort. I started and stopped so many “great” projects & opportunities throughout the years…and I’m okay with that. I never lost my passion for writing though…

31. It’s important to make new friends. Some of my best friends are people whom I’ve known less than 5yrs.

30. F R I E N D S…they add value to your life. There’s a certain level of fulfillment that you reach when you have friends that don’t cost you anything but a genuine spirit. The camaraderie of positivity and fun.

29. It’s okay to lose friends. It happens everyday. “Everyone can’t come”. And with any relationship, chapters change. People change, people grow apart, and that’s okay. I’m okay with it.

28. F R I E N D S….it’s not okay gossip Nakia! It’s not a hard habit to break; it’s a choice. It’s okay to reclaim your integrity & stop at any moment. If you shall pick it back up, just know that you will be gossiped about too.

27. I’ve been learning a lot about friendship…get you some GODLY friends!!

26. Keep learning how to receive. Accept the good.

25. Making time for myself was worth the investment. Clearing mental space.

24. Travel: Investing in experience makes one rich, not monetary, but in the soul

23. Keep my media diet lean; delete, simplify, unplug…

22. Cooking isn’t as hard as it seems. Turns out, I don’t have the patience. Turns out, I THOUGHT I didn’t have the patience and turns out, YUMMLY is my best friend along with GOOGLE!

21. Mistakes are necessary stepping stones & your past is your past. Sounds cliche and maybe it is, but who gives a….

20. Nothing but time kills rumors. Sooner or later it’ll get old & the community will care about someone/something else.

19. I can’t love one foot out the door. I have to be vulnerable in order to receive love at 100% and it scared the hell out of me.

18. BUT love is the answer.

17. Truth heals, but it might hurt at first. I’m not always right and I accept that…NOW!

16. I have to check myself on a daily basis. There’s a war between Nakia & Kia…I like to think of it as a self-evaluation. Stop making things worse.

15. Take fun seriously. Life is too short. I learn to have fun doing things on all levels with all different types of people.

14. Worry wastes energy: Nothing is as bad as it seems and prayer works.

13. Comparing life with strangers and others in general. I am me…what others are doing now, I did before 30 and comparison breeds envy and jealousy.

12. I wanted that picture perfect, hourglass shape until I found out that the people who promoted “Flat Tummy Tea” had surgery…

11. Girl, get you a husband who loves everything about you….

10. There’s no rulebook to parenting. If anyone tells me that they have it all figured out, I’ll stand right there and tell them they’re a liar. I just try to be the person I wish I would’ve had at their age…

9. I can’t control people. When I learned this, life got easier.

8. As a parent, when your child transforms into an adult…you pray for them, love them, & remind yourself that their mistakes is apart of growth. Let them learn & love them in the process….

7. The internet can be defeated…don’t let social media fool you into thinking that a girl’s good friend can’t be her homeboys….mine are REAL!

6. My closest family members aren’t even my family and I’m okay with that. Love sees no relation..

5. Selfishness is from the devil. It’s not always about me…

4. Forgiveness is irrational; do it anyways! I had to forgive 6 people in my life, one of which was myself. TIP: write a letter to the person, trash it, & never bring it back up! An unforgiving spirit is a hindrance to you being the best version of you.

3. When I realized that I couldn’t save the world, I started minding my own business…But those you can help…help them. Blessed people, bless people!

2. To have a man support you, respect you, protect you, pray with you, uplift you, and let you know that you’re not in this alone…man!

1. 2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! Internal growth is everything. And just because you’re not mirroring exactly what you think you should be, doesn’t mean you haven’t accomplished anything. God’s grace is amazing. You already have it, you just have to accept it!


August 4, 2017. I’m blessed to see 35, halfway to 40. Growing old has been scary when I was not actually growing within. When I started doing the work I realized that growing older is beautiful, freeing and humbling. Thank you for being part of my journey. I could not do this journey without you all. My husband, my kids, my friends, my family, my co-workers…..everyone! I love you all <3


Founder and CEO of The Mixx Magazine